Squeaks and Shrieks
by Lyatt1941
Summary: Chaos ensues when Jiya and Lucy discover a mouse in the bunker. One-Shot This is my Day 3 Lyattweek Fic.


The squeak and screech of the rusty drawers in what passed as a kitchen in the run-down World War II bunker they sadly called a home, echoed throughout the various rooms and hallways of the cavernous space making the simple task of opening a drawer pure torture for the inhabitants within.

"Sorry" Lucy muttered as he she saw Jiya flinch out of the corner of her eye. "We should probably get some oil or something for these drawers so they don't do that anymore."

"Yeah right, I think you could waste a whole gallon of WD-40 on this entire rust bucket and it wouldn't make one bit of difference." answered Jiya as she stretched her arms over her head. "Want some help?"

"No," sighed Lucy. "It's my turn to make dinner. You had last night."

Jiya frowned as she looked at the sad slices of bread lining the counter; an assembly line waiting for the slab of mayo and mustard Lucy was haphazardly applying to each and every one. "Really, Lucy – it's no big deal. I can make some mac and cheese or…something."

Lucy rolled her eyes at her, "Look, it's no secret that my night to cook is known as "Lucy Lent" around here, but I'm trying, okay? I want to pull my weight the same as everybody else." She wrenched open the fridge to pull out the lunch meat before jumping back with a horrified scream and scrambling on top of the table.

It took Jiya a moment to realize what was happening before she too let out a terrified squeal and scrambled onto the tabletop next to Lucy causing it to wobble dangerously under their combined weight.

Gun drawn, Wyatt came rushing into the kitchen followed closely by Flynn and Rufus. At the sight of Lucy and Jiya huddled together on the table, however, Wyatt holstered his weapon and shook his head, "What the hell are you two doing up there?" he asked with amusement in his voice.

"Shhhhhh" Lucy motioned him frantically as she pointed a shaky finger to the countertop where a large mouse was nibbling on the corner of one Lucy's sad sandwiches.

Rufus raised his eyebrows as he muttered under his breath, 'Well, at least somebody around here likes Lucy's dinner."

Wyatt shot him a warning glance, but could not help but smile at Rufus's observation.

"I heard that." Lucy shot back at him as Wyatt approached the huddled figures of Lucy and Jiya.

"Lucy," Wyatt chuckled, "It's just a mouse, it's not gonna hurt you."

"Have you ever heard of the bubonic plague?" Lucy asked him with a hiss.

"I thought that was rats?" Flynn observed as he pulled out a chair and took a seat.

"A technicality. Mice can carry it too." Lucy spat out waving her hand at them, but keeping her eyes firmly on the mouse so that it couldn't sneak up on her with another surprise attack. "Wyatt, get rid of it, please. I can't live like this…I can't live in this bunker knowing that this… thing is in here with me."

"Lucy, it's probably been here for a while." Wyatt explained, "I mean, look at this thing, it's not even bothered that we're in here."

"I don't care, Wyatt. That only makes it more dangerous." Lucy argued passionately, "It's supposed to skittish…that thing ran across my foot!" Do you have any idea how disturbing that is?"

Wyatt raked his hand over his face to hide the smile that was now permanently attached to it. He nodded towards Rufus, "Hand me that bowl over there."

'What!?" Jiya exclaimed, "Are you seriously going to trap that thing in a bowl? We eat out of those!" Lucy shuddered beside her as Jiya wrapped her arms more firmly round Lucy's shoulders.

"We'll wash it" said Wyatt irritably.

Lucy shook her head, "No, no…I'm not eating out of anything that thing has touched."

"I imagine it has scampered all over our dishes, Lucy. As Wyatt said, it seems to have been here for a while. Probably lives in the cabinets somewhere. " Flynn observed with a lazy drawl.

"Oh, that's just grrrreat." Lucy spat out as Wyatt inched his way towards the cabinet, bowl in hand.

Feeling every eye in the bunker on him, Wyatt eased himself beside the counter where the mouse was happily nibbling on a piece of bread. As Wyatt hovered the bowl over it, however, the mouse paused and lifted its head in the air, seeming to sniff out the approaching danger. Before Wyatt could bring the bowl down to capture the rodent, it scampered off the counter and onto the floor, causing Lucy and Jiya to shriek and throw themselves further back onto the table. This proved to be too much for the rickety piece of furniture. The imbalance of weight caused the table to slide out from under them and they both collapsed onto the floor with a clatter of metal and curse words.

Suddenly aware of their precarious situation, Jiya and Lucy desperately untangled themselves from the upset table and took the necessary measures to ensure their own safety. Jiya jumping onto a nearby chair and Lucy scrambling up Wyatt's back.

'What the hell? Lucy? What are you doing?" Wyatt groaned as she threw her arms tightly around his neck frantically working her legs up and around Wyatt's torso. "Lucy," Wyatt gasped, "I can't breathe."

"Huh?" Lucy gasped out. "Oh, sorry." She muttered as she moved her arms from his neck to around his head.

"Lucy! Dammit, now I can't see!" Wyatt moaned.

Flynn shook his head in amusement and grabbed the gun from Wyatt's holster. Wyatt spun around as fast as he could, with Lucy hanging onto him and pushed Lucy's arm away from his eye so he could observe Flynn, "What the hell do you think you're doing with my gun?"

Flynn was taking careful aim at the wall where the mouse was now crouched and breathing heavily. "I'm taking care of our problem, Wyatt." He pulled the trigger as a shot rang out through the bunker.

"What the hell, FLYNN!" Rufus yelled out as he ducked his head down, "You're gonna kill somebody trying to get a mouse like that! Haven't you ever seen Star Wars?"

"Don't kill it, Flynn!" yelled Jiya as she removed her hands from her ears.

Flynn turned to her with a smirk, "You don't want me to kill it, but you're too terrified of it to put your feet on the floor?

"It doesn't mean that I want it dead…I just want it out of here!"

"What in the bloody hell is going on out here?" asked Mason who finally emerged from his room looking completely astonished at the sight that met him; Lucy clambered all the way up on Wyatt's back, Jiya standing on a chair, Flynn holding Wyatt's gun and Rufus edging his way out of Flynn's line of sight.

"We have a mouse, Mason." Rufus said matter of factly, "And Flynn thought it would be a great idea to go all Rambo on it."

"That's no way to kill a mouse." Mason remonstrated. "You have to build a trap."

"It seems to like Lucy's sandwiches. I say we build a trap with those." Rufus offered.

"Very funny, Rufus." Lucy said dryly as she climbed even higher onto Wyatt's back as he groaned.

"Well I don't see you offering up any suggestions, Ms. Bossy Pants." Rufus countered. "I was just making an observation. That mouse went straight for your sandwiches…you'd think that you'd be a little more appreciative of the little guy seeing as he's the only one lining up for your grub."

"Fine." Lucy gritted out. "I'm a bad cook, okay? But that doesn't solve our problem…TWO problems now, because there is no way I'm eating one of those sandwiches after that mouse has been all over them."

"Welcome to Lucy Lent." muttered Mason under his breath.

At Lucy's sharp stare, Mason cleared his throat, "I have an idea, let's have a contest! We'll each come up with our own methods to catch this little refugee we have scampering about here and whoever catches the mouse by tomorrow morning….hmm…what can we give the winner?"

"The winner doesn't have to cook for the next month." Wyatt grunted out as Lucy wrapped her arms around his head and neck once more to keep herself from slipping off of his back.

"Excellent." said Mason.

"Um…are you sure about that Wyatt?" said Rufus with raised eyebrows, "I mean, you and I are the two best cooks in the place…"

"What's the matter, Rufus? Afraid you'll lose?"

"Well…if one of us wins…then….that means –" Rufus began.

"Just say it. Say it Rufus." Lucy spat out.

"Well…um." Rufus stuttered. "Lucy, it's just that I don't know if I can fast for more than one night a week….no offense.

Lucy rolled her eyes at him and smacked Wyatt on the head when he let out a reflexive chuckle.

"It's okay." Flynn drawled. "I'm going to kill this mouse before any of you even come up with an idea of how to catch it." Flynn stalked off in the direction the mouse ran, peering along the walls and behind furniture as he went.

Lucy and Jiya absolutely refused to put their feet on the ground after their scare that evening. So, rolling chairs were utilized as a means to transport themselves from one area to the next. Whenever they ran out of wall or furniture, to help push themselves along without the aid of their feet, they would bellow for assistance from any one of the men in the vicinity to get them to their desired location.

Flynn, after being accosted by both Jiya and Lucy on his way to the bathroom, locked himself in his room for the rest of the night.

Rufus and Mason, meanwhile, were working on an improved version of the bottle trap, which would, in theory lure the mouse into an open bottle, setting off the spring mechanism and trapping it inside.

Wyatt, however, was far more practical. He found an empty plastic tub, stuck a piece of wire through one side of a paper plate and fastened it over the mouth of the bucket. He was dabbing some peanut butter on the smaller edge of the plate when Rufus walked up to criticize his handiwork.

"What the hell are you doing, Wyatt?"

"This, my friend, is the only way to catch a mouse. Used to do this all the time in our shed back in Texas." Wyatt said with a hint of pride.

"Uh-huh" said Rufus. "It's awfully big for a mouse trap."

"That's the genius of it, Rufus. The little bastards think they're just crawling up a piece of furniture for a snack, they scramble over the wire and then get on the imbalanced paper plate, it can't hold their weight and into the bucket they go."

"Okay." nodded Rufus, appreciating the ingenuity now. "I see it….it doesn't have an awesome spring mechanism, but we can't all be MIT engineers."

"Any idea what Lucy and Jiya are up to?" Wyatt asked as he looked around, not having seen either one of them rolling by for quite some time.

"I think they went back to their room." Rufus said with a shrug. "Ya know, between you and me…I thought they'd be looking for a little extra protection tonight with this mouse roaming around…but the last I saw they were rolling out of here with boxes and jars…I think they may be building a fort."

Wyatt shook his head as he wandered down the hall. When he got to their door, he knocked and pushed it open only to find Lucy and Jiya sitting on their respective cots armed with fire extinguishers and their entire room covered with jars and boxes propped open with coins. "What the hell is all this?" Wyatt asked incredulously.

"We're not taking any chances" said Lucy haughtily. "You can make fun of us all you want, but if that mouse comes in here, we'll be ready for it."

"And what are you going to do if you have to go to the bathroom?" asked Wyatt as he pointed to their rolling chairs trapped in the back of their room.

Lucy and Jiya exchanged nervous glances. Lucy looked up at Wyatt expectantly. "Oh no. Lucy. I will do anything in the world for you, but I am not carrying you to the bathroom. This is just silly."

"Wyatt," Lucy called out in a warning voice, "you told me out there in that hall that you loved me."

He nodded resolutely, "And I do. But Lucy, -"

"No…no buts Wyatt. If you love me, you will carry me to the bathroom if I need to go."

Jiya piped up, "Tell Rufus, that goes for me too."

Wyatt sighed in resignation, "Anything else? Do I need to stand guard outside your door with my .45 in case the little guy tries to scale the walls of Fort Irrational Fear?

"You may call it irrational." Lucy said as she jutted out her chin indignantly, "but I call it being prepared."

"Right on, sister." Nodded Jiya as she shot her a thumbs up from across the room.

Wyatt shook his head, biting his lip in amused frustration as he made his way back down the corridor where Rufus was coming to meet him. "Did you find them? Have they toned down the crazy…like at all?"

"Yeah," Wyatt said with a chuckle. "Um…about that…how close would you say that you and Jiya are?

The next morning Wyatt and Rufus woke up to screams emanating from Lucy and Jiya's room. Bare foot and bleary eyed the two men ran as fast as they could towards their damsels in distress. Upon opening their door, Wyatt and Rufus were met with the sight of Lucy and Jiya standing on their beds with the fire extinguishers aimed at a box that was shifting along the floor.

"We got it, Wyatt!" Lucy exclaimed excitedly. "We got it!"

"Congratulations" Wyatt said with a yawn as he made to leave the room.

"No, Wyatt! Wait! How are we going to get it out of here?" Lucy gasped out.

Wyatt looked at Rufus as the two of them shrugged. "I don't know…the minute you lift that box up the mouse is gonna bolt."

Lucy and Jiya exchanged fearful glances and inched back to the edge of their cots until they were flush against the wall. "What are we supposed to do? Wyatt? Wyatt!" Lucy hissed but Wyatt was already disappearing from their door frame. "Wyatt Logan you get back here right this instant." Lucy demanded.

Throwing his head back in exasperation, Wyatt meandered his way around the traps set all over the room and held his arms out to Lucy who clambered into them, fire extinguisher still in hand. "Rufus, you're up." Wyatt muttered to his roommate as he carried Lucy out of the room.

Moments later, Rufus came down the hall with Jiya riding piggy back. After making a pit stop at the bathroom, the two couples made their way into the common area where Connor was approaching them excitedly. "Well, we have two winners for our contest!"

"We know," yawned Rufus, "Lucy and Jiya."

"No," said Mason confused. "You and Wyatt." He waved them over to the traps the two of them set out last night and sure enough Rufus had caught one in his bottle trap and Wyatt had caught two in his bucket.

Lucy immediately jumped back on the table. "DO you mean to tell me that there are MORE of them?"

'So wait, if we all caught a mouse then that means…"

Flynn sauntered into the kitchen, with an irritated look on his face, "Good morning, thank you ladies for the wakeup call. It was very much appreciated."

"So, Flynn…did you ever get that mouse?" Wyatt asked as he crossed his arms in satisfaction.

"Not yet...but don't worry, I have no doubt it will happen before the day is out."

Wyatt and Rufus exchanged gratified smirks before Rufus nodded at Flynn, "I hope you're as fast at whipping up pancakes as you are dispatching people because I'm starving."

Flynn protested, "No, it's not my day to cook. It's your day, Rufus."

"Wrong!" said Rufus smugly as he held up his bottle trap with a mouse inside.

Wyatt pointed to the bucket as Flynn's eyes traveled to him. Flynn grimaced as he looked over at Lucy and Jiya. "Don't tell me." he muttered. "you caught one too." Flynn threw up his hands in exasperation, "So I get punished because this place is infested with mice? Mason, you need to call an exterminator."

"Mmmm not my department, not my bunker." Mason said as he waved his hand at Flynn, "But I'm sure you can take it up with Homeland Security. Oh wait, you can't…because you're a fugitive. Happy cooking."

"Yeah," said Wyatt as he slapped him on the back, "happy cooking, Flynn."

"I should've stayed in prison." Flynn muttered.


End file.
